First of all, I would like to apologize for the lack of a post, I have been really busy with sleeping and eating lately. Secondly, I would like to congratulate Jon for receiving more comments in less time than I did on his last post. He must have found the hot button with religion. Thats why I am going to say this: RELIGION! If that doesn’t get me more comments I might actually have to resort to researching my posts and using intelligence in them, and I am sure my readers do not want to see me try to use intelligence. So readers, if you respect me at all, you wont force me to use intelligence and the “R” word, you will simply comment a lot on this post. Now, on to the content.
Gas. Prices. When these two simple words come together in a sentence, you get yelled at for using only nouns and no verbs. You also get angry at how they fluctuate, how they are ridiculously over priced and how people think that once gas is over $3 a gallon, the world is over.
Using only nouns in a sentence makes sense to me. For the rest of this paragraph I will use only nouns, and you will understand me. Nouns. My name Jack food pizza pop. Generations me treat, I you. It. That. Me time you spot. It sentence nouns length post. Paragraph I.
Gas prices fluctuate for three reasons. The first is competition between gas stations. One is always trying to be cheaper than the next. The second reason is that as more gas is used the supply goes down, and thus demand increases. The third is that our friend George Bush sends out his gas fairies every night to change prices and bring him all of the extra profit. Do you know what I say to that? BAD Georgie! Do NOT harvest fairy babies for use in your magical mischief! Because as we all know, it is George’s fault gas is so high and since we can’t prove that by logic, it must be that he has Gas Fairies.
Gas prices are pretty high so I have compiled a list of body organs you can sell and their RGW (Raw Gas Worth. One (1) RGW is equal to one (1) full 10 gallon tank)
- Kidney - .5 RGW
- Liver - 1 RGW
- Blood - .2 RGW
- Bone Marrow - 2RGW
- Arm - .5 RGW
- Leg - .75 RGW
- Soul - You have already sold this so its worth nothing
If you don’t get enough for a trip to the gas station I would suggest looking into bank robbery as a possible career.
Gas is now over three dollars a gallon in most parts of the U.S. and the world is not over so I don’t think we need to worry about that one. Now I am sure the crazy liberals will start saying when gas gets over $4 a gallon the world is over. Do not believe them. The world will be over when gas gets over infinity billion dollars an ounce, and not a second sooner. Scientology told me.
So my readers, don’t fret, I am here to help you through the scary world that relies on gas. If you have any questions, go ahead and post them now while I run to the gas station to power up my brand new gas powered computer. Don’t worry, I will drive a Yaris over there.
chea first comment!
dang! that was my goal…
Good work, once again, my friend
Like the use of sarcasm. Also, a bunch of those “nouns” were actually pronouns.
i counted pronouns as nouns, seeing as they both have the word “noun” in them.
jack that great post. i it. i now two arms y legs para 2.5 fill ups. Gas prices at infinity billion dollars a gallon me happy!!!
please, this is an english only website
How did you know about the faries?
haha
um, what did I say in a previous comment stream about using your real name, and what did jack just say about English only. Come on Maura.
also, I want to see some quality work done on the edgy. There are some key points I want emphasized. 1: he is wearing aviators. 2:U2 iPod 3. wing cape attached to his arms 4: big earmuff headphones 5: sweet action pose 5: completely 3D 6: write stuff on the back of the cape 7: i want full credit
1. you used 5 twice
2. U2 iPod violates alot of copy right infringement crap.
3. And full credit you will get.
Come over some time and we will work on it.
Jack, I’ve been doing some heavy-duty advertising for my site on the largest group in Facebook ever. It has 350000 peopel, so if you post it on the discussion board, guaranteed hits.
this is my real name..at leat I don’t use a shortened version of my real name,(Ben)..and haha is English where I am from. Come on Benjamin.
**least***(from above)
good plan jon…
“and haha is English from where I am from.” …..? What does that even mean? I was talking about your name.
he got you there maura
o well mabey you should be more specific…next time clarify yourslef…and who are you to say Moniquita isn’t an english name..I suppose you know all the English names ever? And Jack…nobody asked you
monas gettin a lil fisty
btw is that how u spell fisty???
fiesty, genius. The comments are coming in like hotcakes on this one, eh jack.
like always jon, lol
matt…i dont undrstand wut fitsy is
maura, its feisty!
feisty
This is an Americanism which is gaining ground in British and Australian English. It is defined in many dictionaries as ‘aggressive, excitable, nervous, touchy’ but is now more often used to mean ’spirited’, ‘assertive’, ‘able to speak up for oneself’ (usually applied to women). It has also appeared in an advertisement for a high-performance car, presumably suggesting that the car is fast, tough, and exciting to drive.
Words tend to change their meanings with time, sometimes through an error which gradually becomes accepted (as with decimate), often by being applied to different things, as in this case. Feisty is changing too quickly for dictionaries to keep up with – and it remains to be seen what the accepted meaning will eventually be.
I found the subject of my next post.
http://www.kasva.net/include.php?path=forum/showthread.php&threadid=3809&entries=0&PHPKITSID=014cf3d40bcd0e0db688bb2700a53d3a#post12391
those are the guys who hacked my site.
haha sweet
oooooo…thanks jack…matt learn to spell and I would have understood..but thanks anyways…i completley understood the whold definition
Amazing
U know I really do need a hot topic like religion. Nobody freakin comments on my site. Come on people there are at least 2 links on this site and heres another one: http://www.jonmcardle.jackminardi.com
excuse me…are we allowed to advertise on this site?
I do what i want
Bump
bump?
back
from where?
this converstaion is very intriguing…
you would
o…thanks
np
in case everybody didn’t know…Caleb took one for the team.
what does that mean?
God Bless his soul
may he rest in peace
I don’t understand what is happening
im not surprised
uhhhhh!!!!
its ok caus caleb told me, suckers
jack, jack, jacktageous. the comments here are essentially a scant and inside conversations between a few close friends. but nonwithstanding, i chortled aloud in this hebrew internet cafe where i spend my quiet days. two jews just stared at me. oh. i have dread locks. i just know mom will be tickled pink. i know you’re jealous that i scare her more than you. and i just remembered that she reads this. hey mom. how are things? i just got kidnapped by buddhist fundamentalists. any other religion followed by that F word, leads to fear. but when prefaced by buddhism, i can only picture a skinny and jovial monk, lighting incense and meditating into his next demure life. but i ramble. and digress. oh! the reason im posting. gas here is equivalent to $3 a gallon too. and most people make less that that i day. are georgie’s fairies taking over the planet? and lib americans can eat dirt for all i care. id like to see them spend one day in a bangkok ghetto.
I agree. All the libs think they are so great but they would not survive on say in a country that does nto afford them all the comforts we do. If only they would open their eyes.
hey..there is an imposter among us!! I did not leave the comment, “its ok caus caleb told me, suckers”…that was someone trying to be me
does that mean that you still don’t know?
wow jack…long time no post…spending too much time on Facebook?
Eh, jack I was wondering if someone said the f bomb, would it be edited out right away?
no genari. Try it I dare you…
um, you try.
i wouldnt edit it.
He’d better delete it.
hahaha..good one
Hey everybody… make sure to get your free itunes back to school sampler from the apple students group. Its rock. The best song on there i have to day is Camilo by State Radio. State Radio is basically my favorite band. Formed by Chad Stokes Urmstrom from the epic indie band Dipatch. CHEA!
cant wait til the hip hop one
new post please…btw Jack you have become quite the Facebook celebrity.
of course i have
you guys make me laugh
you done fucked up now boy
?
ummm..language???
Paul, i have your IP address!!
ouchies
Jack
replace that word in PB’s post with asterisks……. now
Jack I would obey his command if I were you. I don’t like PB anyway
who is a faithful reader?
Jack, portions of our sites are disappearing…
I know. i think this is very bad…
o my jack…im very confused your sight seems to have evaporated..but i figure you’re smart wth the computer you knwo what you’re doing…anyways i just wanted to say i liked your guys skits on media 4 carroll they are funny
lol, your site is getting owned
Hi! Test Msg.!
WTF Was that?
site ownage rofl
check out this comment. i owned this r-tard on the discussion board
http://hs.facebook.com/group.php?gid=2211350907
I totally double pwned that loser
http://hs.facebook.com/group.php?gid=2211350907
I always have terrible trouble with comment-related plugins that require me to put some line in the comment loop; I can never seem to find the right spot. Can anyone tell me where I should put the php line in my comments loop? I haven not modified anything much, and I would be very grateful. Thanks!