In school we watch a show called Channel One. It is on every day during homeroom. We are forced into watching it. Once, when a student didn’t watch it, the teacher strangled him, shot him, threw him out the window and then lit him on fire. Just kidding, she didn’t light him on fire. HAHA. Anyways, we are forced into watching this show. The show isn’t bad. It gives us the news, current events, exciting happenings, and so on. But what frustrates me is the commercials. Only so many people are authorized to advertise in a school environment. (The United States Department of Acceptable School Commercials (USDASC) was founded solely for this reason) That means that there are a total of 5 commercials that they play over and over again. There is one of these I hate the most, and that is the STAND commercial.
This commercial has a teenage girl who stands in front of a graffitied wall complaining about how her dad smokes. She says the companies purposely get her dad to smoke just because they want money. When I heard this I was outraged. I mean, how can a company try to make money! That is preposterous! Or not. All my favorite companies try to make money. My favorite companies include Wendy’s, Walmart, and Joe’s Crab Shack (I got Crabs at Joe’s!) Most of these places try and make money. I have actually never heard of a business that was not trying to make money. Except for maybe McDonald’s. I think they are out for world domination.
Anyways in response to STAND I propose we start a group called SIT (Student Helpers as Interns for Tobacco). I decided not to go with SHIT because, I mean, who would want to join that group? Our motto would be, “Don’t let annoying teenagers with marker on their hand control your life, get up and SIT.” This is, of course, still being worked on. What we would do is go around and find member of STAND and just sit on them. We would also have meetings and crap and maybe even a headquarters. Of course we would be backed by the government with huge grants and subsidies and have celebrity endorsements. The membership would be comprised of students who are smart and know that when we lose some of our freedoms, we lose all of our freedoms.
Always remember, Get up and SIT!